Are you angry? Great you’ve come to the write place. Don’t worry; I am not like those other so called gurus who are going to tell you that everything is going to be okay. Everything is not okay. You just got dumped, humiliated, or thrown into the “lets be friends” category. Instead, I want to get down to the real reason why you’re angry. Then, I will give you some viable advice that will keep you from killing yourself, or anyone who even thinks about rejecting you again.Let’s face it. Rejection is hard, but sadly it is a pivotal part of life. I am sorry; I promised that I would refrain from the self-help mush. However, there are a few things that you have to understand about rejection. One, everybody does it. Two, if people pretend that they don’t reject others, they’re full of it.
There is a picture that society paints that makes you feel that we live is this beautiful utopian world. However, we all know that’s not true. We are really pitted against one another in an endless rut of sadistic pursuits. Like two full bred Bull Terriers, we are forced to fight to the death in some makeshift plywood box, with money hungry spectators surrounding us. So while the self-help gurus are telling you to play nice. Your boss, spouse, or parent are encouraging you to mare and claw your way to the top. Only in the real world, this kind of behavior is not known as dog fighting. Rather, it is known as competition.
So how do you control the hound that’s inside of you?
Well that’s a good question. First, get mad. Yes, you read it right. Allow yourself to be angry. So many people put anger in the bad category, and thus forbid people from feeling this natural primal emotion. People fail to realize that anger can fuel the flames of your desires. Yes, anger when used correctly can be channeled into motivation, execution, and yes you guessed it, success. The whole trick is to not to stay angry with other people for a long period of time. This deflects your energy, and keeps you from focusing on the real issues at hand.
Anger and holding grudges will drive you insane.
If you’re still holding on to Ted who dumped you, Cindy who cheated, and Bill the asshole boss who fired you? You’re delusional. You’re not functioning crazy, wonderfully weird, and socially acceptable delusional. You are in need of being constrained in a straight jacket and heavily medicated delusional. If you’ve been harboring feelings of resentment toward people who hurt you months or even years ago, it’s time to get over it. You need to understand that your mind is playing tricks on you. It is allowing you to relive the horrors of your breakup or rejection over and over again. The sad truth of the matter is that there is something inside of you that simply enjoys the pain. Don’t worry, there is a common solution to stop your reoccurring nightmares, and it doesn’t involve medication. Just send the person who hurt you love. Replace nasty foreboding thoughts with loving thoughts. By doing this, you will not only allow yourself to heal, but you can heal others as well.
So let’s get back to you.
Rejection hurts partly because it makes us feel defeated. We feel like something is wrong with us, or that we simply don’t have what it takes to make things work. Feelings of unworthiness will destroy your self-confidence. This results in you being rejected simply because you lack the self-confidence to be accepted. In my previous article, How To Build A Business Model Shark Tank Style, I mentioned that everything in life is based on your perceived value. So if you truly want to change your perceived value of how you see rejection, you can start by solidifying your self-worth. People who rejected you simply couldn’t see your inner beauty or hidden talents. Or maybe, they just weren’t ready to accept all the great things that you had to offer them.
Sadly, there are some people who get off on rejecting others.
Besides, it is one thing to be rejected. But public humiliation, belittling, and violence just takes rejection to a whole new level. Don’t carry the burden of other people’s problems on your shoulder. Just know that those people are bloodthirsty hounds who are looking to sink their teeth into fresh meat. Their minds are dominated by sick thoughts of insecurity and fear. So they have to attack, mar, and destroy because they are imprisoned by their own fear. Just know that the person who is rejecting you is dealing with their own issues. Their behavior is merely a manifestation of their own feelings of inadequacy and self-hate.
Rejection can happen for a greater purpose.
I promised I would stay away from the self-help mush. However, I have to write this. Being rejected may very well be a blessing in disguise. Rejection can relieve us of a burden, or even open a door to future opportunities. Rejection can help us learn from our mistakes by uncovering our bad habits. Rejection can help us understand the hidden parts of who we are. And it can teach us how to embrace our anger and fear. Lastly, rejection can help us solidify our self worth. So we don’t always feel like a bloodthirsty hound fighting to get his next kill.